Why the name line matters more than it looks
The name on an invitation is the guest list in miniature. "Mr and Mrs Tran" invites two people. "The Tran family" invites the children too. "Anna Lee and guest" means Anna can bring someone. Get it vague and you will spend the weeks before the wedding answering awkward messages about who is allowed to come.
It is also the most personal part of the invitation. A guest who sees their own name, spelled right and with the form of address they are used to, feels invited rather than informed.
Formal and informal forms
For a formal invitation, use titles and full names on the outside and a shorter form inside. For a relaxed wedding, first names are fine for friends, but older relatives and family friends usually still expect a title.
- A married couple: "Mr and Mrs David Tran" (traditional) or "Mai and David Tran" (modern).
- A couple with different surnames, or unmarried: both names on one line, "Ms Mai Le and Mr David Tran".
- A family with children invited: "The Tran Family", or the parents’ names followed by the children’s first names.
- A single guest with a plus-one: "Ms Anna Lee and Guest". If you know the partner’s name, use it.
- Professional titles: "Dr", "Professor" or a military rank go before the name when the guest uses them.
- Teachers, elders and family friends: when in doubt, use the more formal form. Nobody is offended by respect.
Addressing guests in Vietnamese families
If your wedding includes Vietnamese relatives, the name line follows Vietnamese forms of address, which depend on age and family relationship rather than just on marriage. Uncles and aunts are addressed by their place in the family ("Chú Hai", "Cô Ba"), and a family is invited through its head ("Ông Nguyễn Văn Minh và gia đình").
Our Vietnamese version of this guide goes into those forms in detail. If your partner’s family is Vietnamese, ask them to check the names for their side: the right form of address matters more to many older relatives than any wording on the card.
One personal link per guest
Online invitations solve the envelope problem differently. Instead of writing names on envelopes, you send each guest their own link with their name in it. On Perlink you type the guest’s name in the invitation letter’s settings and copy the link it gives you, which ends in ?to= and the name. When that guest opens the page, the sealed envelope reads "For Anna and Tom" and the letter greets them by name.
Because the link carries the name exactly as you typed it, you control the form of address per guest: "Uncle Hai and family" for one, "Anna" for another, "Professor Lee" for a third. The page is the same for everyone; only the greeting changes.
With the one-time Wedding pass, your dashboard also lists which named guests have opened their invitation, so you know who to remind before the reply date.
Uncle Hai and family Aunt Lan and Uncle Phong Anna and Tom Professor Lee Minh and guest
Two families, two sides
When each family holds its own reception, the name line is only half of it: each guest also needs the right time and place. Make one page with a Groom’s side tab and a Bride’s side tab, then add the side to each guest’s link, for example ?to=Uncle%20Hai&side=groom. That guest sees their name on the envelope and their family’s schedule first, and can still look at the other side.
Keep a simple spreadsheet while you do it: name as written on the link, side, and whether they replied. It takes ten minutes and saves the week before the wedding.
Mistakes that cause awkward conversations
Most addressing problems come from being vague to avoid a decision. Decide who is invited first, then write names that say it.
- Writing "and family" when you meant only the parents. Children will come.
- Leaving out a long-term partner’s name. Use it if you know it; ask a friend if you do not.
- Misspelling a name, or using a nickname with an elder. Check spellings against how they write it themselves.
- Sending a group chat one generic link. Everyone in the chat assumes everyone is invited, plus-ones included.
- Forgetting that a guest may forward the link. A personal greeting makes clear who it was for.