Think in moments
A wedding has five or six musical moments, and each one has a job. The processional sets the mood and covers a walk of one to three minutes. The signing needs something that can loop without anyone noticing. The first dance is the one song people will remember. Dinner music should let people talk. The party should get your least musical uncle on the floor.
Write the moments down with a rough time for each before you pick a single song. It turns an endless playlist into a short list of decisions, and it is exactly what your band, DJ or the venue’s sound technician will ask you for.
Walking down the aisle
Classical pieces still dominate the processional because they build slowly and can be cut at any bar. Modern couples often choose a slow pop song played on piano or strings instead of the original recording, which keeps it elegant and avoids a vocal starting halfway down the aisle.
- Canon in D, Johann Pachelbel: the most-played processional, easy to time to any walk.
- Bridal Chorus ("Here Comes the Bride"), Richard Wagner: the traditional entrance.
- A Thousand Years, Christina Perri: very popular as a piano or string version.
- Can’t Help Falling in Love, Elvis Presley: slow and familiar to every generation.
- River Flows in You, Yiruma: solo piano, gentle and short.
The ceremony, signing and exit
During the signing or the tea ceremony, choose instrumental music that can play quietly for ten minutes. For the exit, go upbeat: this is the moment the guests clap and the photographer gets the best shots.
- Wedding March, Felix Mendelssohn: the classic recessional, bright and fast.
- Married Life, Michael Giacchino (from the film Up): instrumental, warm, a little playful.
- Marry You, Bruno Mars: upbeat for the walk back up the aisle.
The first dance
Pick a song you both love, then listen to the lyrics as if you had never heard them; some well-known love songs are about breaking up. Check the length too. Most first dances feel long after two and a half minutes, so ask your DJ to fade it out early or to bring guests onto the floor for the last chorus.
- Perfect, Ed Sheeran
- All of Me, John Legend
- Thinking Out Loud, Ed Sheeran
- Beautiful in White, Shane Filan: a favourite at weddings across Asia
- Make You Feel My Love, Adele
Dinner and the party
Dinner music should be familiar and low: acoustic covers, jazz standards, soft instrumental versions of songs your guests know. Keep it quiet enough that people at a round table can hear each other.
For the party, start with songs every age group knows, then move toward what your friends want. Tell your DJ about two or three songs guests always ask for in your family and any you never want to hear.
- September, Earth, Wind & Fire
- Dancing Queen, ABBA
- Uptown Funk, Mark Ronson featuring Bruno Mars
- I Gotta Feeling, The Black Eyed Peas
Music on the online invitation
An online invitation can play music too, which sets the mood before guests read a word. On Perlink the music starts when the guest taps to open the sealed letter, because phones block sound until a person taps. You pick a track from the built-in library: romantic piano, tender piano, acoustic guitar, lo-fi and others, all royalty-free.
Why not your first-dance song? Playing a commercial recording on a public web page needs a licence that a wedding invitation does not have, and video and music platforms can take such pages down. Royalty-free tracks avoid that. Save the famous songs for the venue, where the band or the venue’s licence covers them.
Questions to ask your band or DJ
A short brief saves a lot of surprises on the day. Send it a month before the wedding with your list of moments.
- Can you play the processional live, and how do you time it to the walk?
- Who announces the entrances and the first dance, and how do you pronounce our names?
- Do you have a wireless microphone for speeches?
- What do you play while setting up, and between sets?
- What volume do you keep during dinner?